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Punctuation is powerful! »
Aug 31 2007

The Third Biggest Lie In The World

Posted by Bucky in Funny Stuff

Ann Landers challenged her readers to come up with the world’s third-biggest lie — right after “The check is in the mail” and “I’m from the government and I’m here to help you.” Here is a sampling from the thousands she received:

- “It’s a good thing you came in today. We only have two more in
stock.”

- “Five pounds is nothing on a person of your height.”

- “You made it yourself? I never would have guessed.”

- “Of course I’ll respect you in the morning.”

- “You don’t look a day over 40.”

- “Dad, I need to move out of the dorm into an apartment of my own so I can have some peace and quiet when I study.”

- “It’s delicious, but I can’t eat another bite.”

- “The new ownership won’t affect you. The company will remain the same.”

- “Your hair looks just fine.”

- “Put away the map. I know exactly how to get there.”

- “You don’t need it in writing. You have my personal guarantee.”

OK, actually the above is a joke, but I wonder if you could suggest any more good lies?


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    This entry was posted on Friday, August 31st, 2007 at 5:38 am and is filed under Funny Stuff. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

    11 Responses to “The Third Biggest Lie In The World”
    1. gigi says:
      September 5, 2007 at 11:21 am

      How about: “It’s not you, it’s me” ?
      ;)

      Reply
    2. Bucky says:
      September 5, 2007 at 11:27 am

      I had not thought of that one. Very true!

      Reply
    3. Fred Garvin says:
      September 5, 2007 at 12:23 pm

      Of course one of the biggest: “No, that doesn’t make your butt look fat.”

      Reply
    4. glen says:
      September 5, 2007 at 2:09 pm

      trust me,i am a motor trader!!!

      Reply
    5. Shandooga says:
      September 5, 2007 at 2:36 pm

      [insert name of leader of foreign nation] is in a relationship with Al Qaeda and [country name] is a supporter of terror.

      Reply
    6. Bucky says:
      September 5, 2007 at 3:32 pm

      ahhh yes. The ‘ol blame game!

      Reply
    7. Jason says:
      September 5, 2007 at 3:38 pm

      “They let you try it for free?!? It must be good.”

      Reply
    8. James - Visualized.Feel.Abundance says:
      September 6, 2007 at 9:44 pm

      How about this, commonly heard in court!

      “I swear to tell the truth, Nothing but the truth!”

      :)

      Reply
    9. Snookered says:
      September 9, 2007 at 12:09 am

      Her’s my fave-

      “Islam, the religion of peace.”

      Reply
    10. gigi says:
      September 20, 2007 at 4:55 am

      I just thought of two more:

      “I hate to say …”

      and

      “I would NEVER do that to you!”

      ;)

      Reply
    11. gigi says:
      September 20, 2007 at 5:00 am

      (Sorry, this is just an edit of my previous post, which did not displayed correctly)

      I just thought of two more:

      “I hate to say I told you so…”

      and

      “I would NEVER do that to you!”

      ;)

      Reply
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