Archive for July, 2008

Don't eat any Chinese food today or you will be sick.

Random Unrelated Image: Turn Left!

On one particularly sunny summer Saturday, while watching the comedian Dave Attell crack jokes about eating penguins, the dreaded discussion of dinner plans developed. Not wanting to cook, my wife suggested we order some kind of take-out. In the mood for something south of the border, I suggested Mexican food. But alas, my taco and enchilada filled dreams were not to materialize as I had to concede to my family’s wishes of Chinese food.

I went along with what my family wanted and ordered beef lo mien.

Twenty minutes later, I relaxed on the microsuede sofa, periodically eating the passable lo mien straight out of the carton, still chuckling at the comedic styling of Dave Attell. As usual, the vegetables along with the noodles were either soggy or a little too singed and the beef was over cooked and fatty, but my hunger wouldn’t allow me to neglect a decent meal.

After consuming around half of the container along with an egg roll, I decided enough was enough, closed the carton and stuck it in the refrigerator. I finally arrived at my favorite part of the Chinese take out experience, the end accompanied by a fortune cookie. With a pleasant snap I broke the little piece of fried dough right down the center.

Something was missing from the oriental concoction. I noticed, to my bewilderment, the lack of a fortune, a big disappointment when spending an entire meal looking forward to some quip about success and an assortment of lucky lottery numbers. But not wanting to waste a treat, I popped each half of the broken cookie into my mouth without flourish.

Who would make such a shoddy fortune cookie? I thought of writing the company an unfavorable e-mail in bold red type, but then again it was only a cookie and the best they could do was offer condolences or send me another. Could a fortune cookie sans fortune even be called a fortune cookie, or was it now just a cookie, albeit one in my stomach? Maybe the situation presented a blank check of sorts, an opportunity to make up my own fortune. Or maybe it was just a fortune cookie without a fortune.

All of this cookie talk makes me wonder… does Leptovox work?

On a more serious note from my usual self fullfillment of daily BS, my 3 week old son had an abnormal result for cystic fibrosis. We are going this morning to find out whether or not he is simply a carrier, or if he has the disease.

It has been very stressful at our house the past few days in our panic and fear of this rare disease. There are only about 30,000 people in the US and 70,000 worldwide that have this.

We are heading to the Womens and Childrens Hospital in Charleston, WV at 7am this morning to have a test done. If you have a spare moment, please think of us today.

Sleepy, Sleepy, Lukas.

Ignorance Is Bliss

Random Unrelated Image: Vintage Condom Wrappers

Ignorance is bliss. You don’t know what is going on where, you have no reason to panic. You don’t know there’s some random threat from an unnamed terrorist so you don’t go out and spend fifty dollars on duct tape and water. Nothing happens, you’re safe in your living room, ignorant. You see leaves bustling in the breeze across your well-trimmed lawn, you don’t know that this is only a high concentration of air (oxygen, nitrogen, and other trace gases) moving to a low concentration while the leaf’s chlorophyll is slowly dying, being cut off from it’s main source of life, the tree. You don’t know these things and you’re happy just watching the leaf blow by innocently. You don’t know how fire works, how the wax below it doesn’t actually burn, it turns to a gas from the heat kept steady on the wick, and that’s what really burns. You’re happy watching the candle burn, the fire dance, the shadows flicker. The simplicity astonishes you and you don’t even know it. There is beauty there, in that simple view, in that ignorant glance. A leaf stumbling around in the wind, a candle flame dancing.